Thanksgiving

In light of my last post, I won't go into too much detail. Suffice to say I am so very thankful for so much. I am blessed beyond description.
For Thanksgiving this year, I was on mashed potato and dessert duty. I decided on garlic red-skinned mashed potatoes and a pumpkin cheesecake, both of which turned out well. Bobby made rolls and rye bread and brought his homemade jam as well. Between the neighbors, my aunt, and us we had a ton of delicious food. Ironically, no one brought pumpkin pie!! :-)
Before we went to my aunt's, we stopped at Gramma's and said hello. Below are some videos I took of the day...just for you Mom and Dad. And Mary Ann, there's a bit with Amos in there too. I'm so glad he could come!
PS - someday I'll learn how to put these all together instead of having three separate ones. Sorry for that.



HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

I also got to give some tortoises shots. I've given lots of humans some shots, but never a reptile! (my aunt's tortoises are sick)

A Grateful Person

I was sitting at a coffee shop today with my nursing classmates working on the dreaded group project. As I was sitting there I began to get a bit grumpy because I could think of a dozen other things I'd rather be doing... Not that I don't enjoy my friends...but who wants to spend Thanksgiving break sitting in a coffee shop working on a fictitious project, a project that smacks of busy-work and uselessness? I looked down at my Mac and surfed the internet, sipped on my coffee, and tugged my scarf a bit closer to my neck. All of the sudden my stomach sank and this overwhelming feeling of self-confrontation descended.

Am I truly grateful for all that I have? I have 24/7 access to the internet on a laptop I love. I was sitting in a coffee shop drinking an overpriced cup of coffee I had paid for. I was wearing a warm scarf I had gotten in Spain on my semester abroad. I have SO much! And all too often I am grateful for so little of it. I am 3.5 weeks away from finishing nursing school. God has blessed me beyond belief. I dare not say that He has blessed me more than I deserve because I deserve absolutely nothing. I have done nothing to "earn" any of this... God is so faithful and good. And the ironic and sovereign thing is that even if I were failing all my classes, had been dropped from the program, or had a tragedy suddenly happen in my life, God would still be just as faithful and good. My circumstances do not change His goodness or faithfulness. Taken a step further, my circumstances, regardless of what they may be, are simply an everlasting testimony to His greatness.

Viewed in retrospect, I am grateful for more than just the "things" I have. I am grateful for the trials, the frustrations, even for those who complain nonstop. Through these things He is teaching me perseverance, patience, discernment, and faithfulness. I fail miserably all the time at my effort to be grateful, but He sustains me and gently encourages me to keep my eyes on Him and the things that matter.

I've recently been listening to the song "Grateful People". This is my prayer, that I would be grateful to my King, surrender and give Him the praises He so righteously deserves. Take my life, O God.

A Grateful People
It is time that we give you honor
This is the day to give you
All the praise that you deserve

A Holy King, of everything
Inhabit the praises of Your people

Have we waited far too long to surrender
Forgive us, Oh God, the years
We failed to seek your face
Oh Lord, your mercy turns us into
Grateful people
We can’t seem to find the words
So take our lives that there might be enough
To tell you how grateful Lord, we are grateful

Bless the Lord, oh my soul
(He has done great things)
And all that is within me
(He had done great things)
Bless His holy name

Jerk-face

WARNING: this may be long and detailed

I learned a very important lesson in the hospital today. Granted, I knew the lesson in theory already, but today I saw it in practice. Doctors can be amazing or they can be utter jerks. I spent my day in the Critical Cardiovascular Unit. Most of the patients have just had major heart surgery or are very hemodynamically unstable. One of our patients (of two) had multiple issues going on and without being too specific, he was one day status/post major chest surgery. He had two chest tubes draining excess fluid from the sac that holds the lungs and a very large central line in his internal jugular vein. He was pretty stable, but also had Alzheimers. He was confused and just wanted to get his clothes and go home. He had been ok until his night nurse had started to mess with his foley catheter (which goes to the bladder). It is very hard to maintain a man's modesty when dealing with foleys which is unfortunate as most nurses are women. I can understand the embarassment, awkwardness, and frustration that guys must go through...but to be confused on top of it; I'd be combative too!

When we came on shift we were careful to maintain his modesty; and he made sure we knew that we were NOT to interfere with him. He was already sitting up in a chair, complete with all his tubes. We entered his room for his morning assessment and noticed his heart rate was in the 150s, when normal for him was 90-110. Not good. His blood pressure was ok, so we immediately thought pain - a logical conclusion given the circumstances. He indicated he was indeed in pain in his side, near his surgical site. We assessed the site and made sure his chest tube was draining appropriately. No problems there. He had a standing order for morphine, which we then administered via IV push.

Fifteen minutes later we came back to reassess his pain and vital signs. Uh-oh...his heart rate was still in the 150s but his BP was in the 70s/40s. Yikes! We checked his BP again and his systolic was in the 60s. The doc was supposed to be in the OR with an open heart procedure, but we paged him anyways. What a shock (sarcastic), he wasn't even at the hospital. I should have known that was a bad sign. He told us to start infusing him with tons of fluid as it seemed like he was hypovolemic (low fluid in the vascular system) and start him on Amiodorone and Digoxin, both drugs which increase blood pressure and contractility of the heart. The patient immediately improved and was ultimately fine. Side note: we had already prepped the meds before the doc called us as we knew that this is probably what would be ordered.

When the doc showed up 15 minutes later, he proceeded to chew the nurse out because the morphine had caused the drop in blood pressure and she should know that. He never even gave her an opportunity to explain the patient had complained of pain and was showing other physical symptoms of pain beyond tachycardia (fast heart rate). He was belligerant, berating, and demeaning.

I was impressed by the nurse who later explained the situation to me in detail...including that this doc is known to be difficult with nurses. I appreciated her statement that she would stand by her decision to administer morphine, given the symptoms and circumstances. As nurses, we all too often get trampled on by the doctors who hold so much power. Nurses need to stand by their guns as they are the ones assessing their patients and stay them for 12 hours a shift. Patients don't go to the hospital for the doctor, they go for the nurses.

This is NOT to say I don't appreciate doctors. Like I said, this was my first experience with a truly difficult doctor, which says an awful lot considering I only have 4 weeks left of nursing school! I am very thankful for docs and what they have done in my own health and life. And just like there are bad doctors there are just as many bad nurses.

So how do you come off an experience like the one I had today? Why, go to the "happiest place on earth!" Disneyland! :-) Nothing like a little "Soarin" to calm the indignant spirit. (Thank goodness for annual passes!)

And if you made it to the end of this post...wow, you deserve an award. :-)

What Do I Value?

Last night the evacuations had come within 2.5-3 miles (as the crow flies) of us, but knowing that we're in the middle of a bunch of concrete, I knew that we were going to be fine. Just in case, Mel got her stuff files together in case we had to leave in a hurry...the only smart one of the group. This morning I woke up to snow falling...I mean, is that ASH? Wow! Ash covered the ground and continued to fall all through the day.

As I got to watching the news, it made me sad to see all the homes that burned. If I had to suddenly leave, what would I be most upset about leaving? Being that I'm still young, it's amazing how much junk I've accumulated in my life. But that's all it really is: junk. I'd grab my files, my laptop, some clothes, maybe a few old books, my Bible, but that's about it. Everything else is replaceable. When I was little, our family lost everything we had in our storage unit: Mom's wedding dress, Grandad's baby clothes, antique china, heirlooms, etc... Do I store up for myself treasures on earth where fires can destroy? (Matt 6:19-20) It's easy for me to say that when I'm all warm, dry, and protected but I would imagine it would be an awful lot harder for me to say if I had just lost just about every earthly possession I own. I know several people who lost their homes yesterday and my heart continues to go out to them.

Here are some photos that I got from various news sources that tell a bit more of the story.

The day the sky turned orange

First of all, I am very safe...

But my heart is going out to the thousands of people displaced from their homes and the hundreds who have already lost their homes. This fire came so fast and furious that there was no time to grab the wedding albums, the family Bible, the family heirlooms, or anything but their kids and pets. So sad. Please pray for them. Many more will loose their homes before the day is over.

Here's a view of what I woke up to this morning:

40 days of temptation

I've started to call the rest of nursing school as my "40 days of Temptation." Not that I think my situation is similar to Jesus', not at all. But, the temptations during these next 40 days are going to be intense. I like to think of myself as the queen of procrastination. Why do it today if I can do it tomorrow? right? So, why should I work on all my papers, projects, and exams if I can read a fun book, take a nap, watch an episode of my favorite TV show, or just veg?I've had to start going somewhere to study... a place without so many distractions. So rather than procrastinate a little more with my blog, I'm going to get back to Subdural bleeds. :-( Let the 40 days begin...the sooner they're done, the sooner I'M done!!!

Annual Camping Trip

What camping with the girls means to me:
Laughter. Dough Boys. Rain. Waves. Pancakes, Eggs, Bacon. Apples to Apples. Friends. Greasy Hair. Biola Stories. Air Mattresses. Huge Tents. Sunsets. Beach. Dirt. Sweat. Bailey's. Hammock. Love.

48 days to go

I cannot believe it is November 1st. This means that I only have 48 days until this semester is over. Only 48 more days until I will be eligible to take the board exams that will certify me as a registered nurse. For so long that goal has seemed so elusive. I have purposely not looked towards it that much because it can be overwhelming to comprehend all that must happen before that time. Instead, I choose to take life one day, one careplan, one exam at a time. I can get through it, but sometimes I prefer to take life in bite-sized pieces. But now that school ends in just 48 days, I can look at the light at the end of the tunnel. It's still overwhelming...after all, I have just 48 days to write 3 more careplans, a huge Change Project (think lots of busy work with a very particular professor and 15 pages of research), a group grant proposal, 2 midterms, 2 final exams, 2 assessment exams, and a whole lotta class time. It will all get done, but it's going to be a bit hairy at the end.

November 1st also means that it's now fall!!! I like fall. I never got to enjoy the changing of traditional seasons back home. So those who complain that California has no seasons should all go to a tropical island and realize that plenty changes in SoCal for fall. Today was a perfect fall day...a bit balmy and rainy. Still warm enough to wear short sleeves but cool enough to enjoy a nice pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks. Beautiful. Fall reminds me of my time in London and making an American Thanksgiving dinner for all my flatmates. Such fun times.

Making the stuffing.All the amazingly yummy food...